Life With Toddlers by Michelle Smith Ms Slp & Dr. Rita Chandler

Author:Michelle Smith Ms Slp & Dr. Rita Chandler [Slp, Michelle Smith Ms & Chandler, Rita]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Parenting & Relationships, Parenting, Early Childhood, Babies & Toddlers, Child Rearing
ISBN: 1449546250
Amazon: B002XULI42
Publisher: The S5 Publishing Group
Published: 2009-10-18T16:00:00+00:00

The Nitty Gritty on Sharing & Stealing

Before we go any further, let’s get something out in the open. SHARING IS NOT NATURAL. Okay? I’ve said it. Sharing is not natural for mature people, much less our egocentric young. Really, how many of you don’t mind lending your corvette to your sister every other day? What about merrily shacking up your husband’s best friend until he finds a job? Any of you pregnant Mommies mind sharing your food? Maybe you’re a better person, but when I’m pregnant, anyone so much as glancing at my hamburger is in for hell. Honestly, we don’t share because we want to. We share because we should. From a very young age, we’ve been taught to share with others. We don’t want to, but we do.

Toddlers are uncivilized versions of adults. They have not yet learned how to grit their teeth and smile while handing over a prized possession. When playing with an object or toy, some toddlers are very agreeable to handing it over or giving it up when asked. If not, they can learn this skill.

But we really aren’t talking about sharing in the true sense of “this is mine and you can have some.” What we’re really talking about here is not stealing. Toddlers have no idea, nor do they give a horse’s patoot, that it’s uncouth to screech “Mine!” and forcefully seize any desired object from any person. Operating on raw emotion, toddlers are expected to act vehemently possessive because they have total freedom from guilt or conscience.

At some point, we have to teach the undomesticated little darlings some manners. I completely concede that sharing is not natural for the clueless little sweeties. But part of the life of a toddler is learning to temper your emotions and play nice with the other kiddies. Those are the rules, and there’s no getting around these life lessons.

The best time to start teaching our toddlers how to interact with other civilized human beings is NOW. The longer we wait, the longer our children go along in life thinking they rule the roost. I nearly put a choke hold on a four-year-old recently who decided he was thirsty and literally tried to snatch my daughter’s drink right out of her hand – as she was drinking. What…what?? Where the heck were the manners? And for that matter, where the hell was the parent? This was a birthday party, for heaven’s sake. Letting your offensive kid run wild at a party and expecting other Mommies to sweep up the mess is really dropping the ball, girl! Grrr!

Don’t wait until your toddler’s old enough to understand the concept of sharing (not stealing) before you introduce the need. You’d be waiting for the cows to come home, and besides, it bursts too big a bubble. Speaking from a purely logistical standpoint, it would also be a monster of a battle. If our little dumplings have been able to grab and yell their way through the first three or four years of life, it’d be a stand up fight convincing them the need to change.

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